Someone recently asked me, “How do you know when you have forgiven someone who wronged you?”
How do you know? You know you’re forgiving someone when your reaction to what happened in the past changes. You know when you’re not relating to them anymore as someone who wronged you.
Forgiving means letting go of the “I got hurt” story. How you know you’ve forgiven someone is when you see something else other than the hurt.
Forgiving is something that happens when you choose it. You choose it when you decide that the benefit of not forgiving is no longer worth the price you’re paying.