Appetite for leadership

A couple of weeks ago I was asked to co-plan and lead a joint meeting with my men’s team and another men’s team.

I worked with the captain of the other team to plan the meeting and develop the agenda. As the meeting date drew closer I started running out of steam. I found myself feeling resentful of intrusion of this meeting into my time when I had so many other things I needed to do. I found myself not even wanting to go to the meeting. I had given my word though, so it’s not like backing out was even an option.

It was snowing on the evening of the meeting and the weather caused traffic delays. It meant I would be late for the meeting and there would be consequences for being late. I made up my mind I wasn’t going to take any consequences. No way. Not after all I did to get myself there and it’s not even my fault, the weather was beyond my control.

I arrived late. Other men had already arrived. A good number of them had managed to get themselves there on time in spite of the weather. My partner had not arrived yet. The meeting needed a leader and it was up to me.

I found that I could not do it. I could not let the evening go to waste and I could not bring my sucky crappy attitude into that circle and let it poison the energy in the room.

I quickly did my consequences for being late. Got them out of my way. Now I wouldn’t have to waste time and energy arguing, defending, or feeling guilty. No one told me to do them, no one made me do them, I just found myself wanting to do them.

Then I stepped into the room full of men and took charge. The instant I did so I found that my attitude changed. I was no longer resentful, I was now engaged and fully on and confident in what I was doing and in where I would lead those men that night.

I am not a natural leader and I am not a born leader. All my skill in leadership is something that I’ve learned and developed.

I am glad to know that I can access my leadership energy in an instant when I have to.

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